Theyre all in favour of the unborn. We have the war on crime, the war on cancer, the war on drugs. When you die, it all stays here. The people are fucked. George Carlin, May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house. George Carlin, Some people have no idea what theyre doing, and a lot of them are really good at it. George Carlin, Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity. George Carlin, We have multiplied our possessions but reduced our values. What do you get at the end of it? In this blog post, well take a look at some of his best quotes on the subject. Whether you agree with him or not, George Carlins views on government are definitely worth considering. Yeah, I know, youre thinking. document.getElementsByTagName("head")[0].appendChild(stylesheet); Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity. When you step on the brakes, your life is in your foots hands. My first rule: I don't believe anything the government tells me. Tell them the paint is wet, and they have to touch it to be sure. George Carlin. George Carlin has many famous quotes about government, education and the American dream that are often referenced as truth. "ebfg_email", "ebfg_sms"]; In fact, George Carlin had some pretty interesting things to say about government. return false; You dont. var source = getCookieWithoutJQuery("source"); Carlin is well-known for pivoting from a strait-laced, suit-and-tie approach to standup in the late 1960s and early . The future will soon be a thing of the past. Your cat thinks the dog's an asshole. I look at war a little. In America, anyone can become president. The politicians are put there to give you the idea that you have freedom of choice., Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups., If churches want to play the game of politics, let them pay admission like everyone else., Political correctness cripples discourse, creates ugly language and is generally stupid., Bipartisan usually means that a larger-than-usual deception is being carried out., When I hear a person talking about political solutions, I know I am not listening to a serious person., If you have selfish, ignorant citizens, youre gonna get selfish, ignorant leaders., If you have selfish and ignorant citizens then you too will become a selfish and bad leader.. Get future posts byemail,oryou can follow us onInstagram,Pinterest,andFacebook. You have owners. George Carlin George Denis Patrick Carlin (May 12, 1937 - June 22, 2008) was an American comedian, social critic, actor, and author Carlin was noted for his black comedy and his thoughts on politics, the English. Toothpicks?George Carlin, No matter how you care to define it, I do not identify with the local group. g.parentNode.insertBefore(A, g) George Carlin's full name was George Denis Patrick Carlin. stylesheet.type = "text/css"; George Carlin. The less said about it the better. George Carlin,Brain Droppings, Catholic, which I was until I reached the age of reasonGeorge Carlin, They say that instead of cursing the darkness, one should light a candle. When you're born you get a ticket to the freak show. Most people work just hard enough not to get fired and get paid just enough not to quit. The politicians are put there to give you the idea that you have freedom of choice. Save the planet! Quotes by George Carlin One of the most iconic comedians of all time. Laugh often, long and loud. I think that speaks for itself. And if you do any of these things, he will send you to a special place, of burning and fire and smoke and torture and anguish for you to live forever, and suffer, and suffer, and burn, and scream, until the end of time. You caused the problem; you voted them in; you have no right to complain. George Carlin, 70. Lets get started! George Carlin Quotes Government : "Most of the government wants to control information and language so that it can control you. Soon enough youll be dead and burning in Hell with the rest of your family. George Carlin,Brain Droppings, You show me a lazy prick whos lying in bed all day, watching TV, only occasionally getting up to piss, and Ill show you a guy whos not causing any trouble. George Carlin,Brain Droppings, I have lots of ideas. " Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups. George Carlin, If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?George Carlin, I like it when a flower or a little tuft of grass grows through a crack in the concrete. Careful, if you think too much, theyll take you away. And apparently Im not a very good American because I like to form my own opinions.George Carlin, Im completely in favor of theseparation of Church and State. These two institutions screw us up enoughon their own, so both of them together iscertain death.George Carlin, I dont have pet peeves I have major psychotic fucking hatreds.George Carlin, I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, Wheres the self-help section? She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.George Carlin, If your kid needs a role model and you aint it, youre both fucked. George Carlin,Brain Droppings, Its important in life if you dont give a shit. }); Im sure it made the work seem that much more urgent. George Carlin, 27. Hope these quotes will give you a different perspective on government and how it works. George Carlin political quotes may seem sensitive, but they inspire necessary conversations. Every now and then you find yourself in a different place. George Carlin, 31. } gads.src = (useSSL ? init: function() { The poor are just there just to scare the shit out of the middle class. Pointing out the things which are influencing our society badly with humor is not an easy task to do. 3. But there is an I in independence, individuality and integrity.George Carlin, Some people see the glass half full. googletag.pubads().setTargeting("gr_author", "false"); var node = document.getElementsByTagName("script")[0]; George Carlin. But there is an I in independence, individuality, and integrity. Some of our partners may process your data as a part of their legitimate business interest without asking for consent. In this article, we present to you some of the famous George Carlin Quotes on Government, Marriage, Love, Life, Religion, Death, Voting, Freedom, Politics and More with their meaning. //]]> "I have a right, you have no right, we have a right." Folks I hate to spoil your fun, but. The next time they give you all that civic bullshit about voting, keep in mind that Hitler was elected in a full, free democratic election. George Carlin, 66. George Carlin. Every day I beat my own previous record for the number of consecutive days Ive stayed alive. If you enjoyed the following article we humbly ask you to comment, and help us spread the word! George Carlin Quotes Government George Carlin American Comedian born on May 12, 1937, died on June 22, 2008 George Denis Patrick Carlin was an American stand-up comedian, social critic, actor, and author. He's the subject of a new documentary. I like it when a flower or a little tuft of grass grows through a crack in the concrete. Right in the f--in head! Men are often so foolish as to boast and value themselves upon their passions, even those that are most vicious. " George Carlin You do drugs, alcohol, you party, you get ready for high school. Goalcast inspires the world through stories. Its so f***ing heroic. They own, and control the corporations. When you're born you get a ticket to the freak show. George Carlin Quotes - BrainyQuote. I hate a group of people with a 'common purpose'. You have no choice. Just cause you got the monkey off your back doesnt mean the circus has left town. George Carlin, 23. Teach them to question everything. //]]> Never argue with an idiot. Dont just teach your children to read Teach your children to question what they read, teach them to question everything. If black boxes survive air crashes why dont they make the whole plane out of that stuff? George Carlin, 55. Your dog thinks you're a god. So, I dislike and despise groups of people but I love individuals. If youre born in America you get a front row seat.George Carlin, Dont sweat the petty things and dont pet the sweaty things.George Carlin, If its true that our species is alone in the universe, then Id have to say the universe aimed rather low and settled for very little.George Carlin,Napalm & Silly Putty. And a list of people theyre going to visit at 3am. Theres no present. The real reason that we cant have the Ten Commandments in a courthouse: You cannot post Thou shalt not steal, Thou shalt not commit adultery, and Thou shalt not lie in a building full of lawyers, judges, and politicians. George Denis Patrick Carlin was born May 12, 1937, in the Bronx, New York. Trying to be happy by accumulating possessions is like trying to satisfy hunger by taping sandwiches all over your body. Feel free to reach out and connect. Being considered as one of the top comedians of all time, George is well known for his black humor, political views, observations on language, psychology, and religion along with many other So, we must be clear about our expectations for government and its role in our lives. We talk too much,love too seldom, and hate too often. Now you can finally see what made George Carlin the dad tick. Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac? Most people with low self-esteem have earned it. George Carlin, 29. I mean, life is tough. Some people see the glass half full, others see it half empty. People are wonderful one at a time. I'm the Founder of SucceedFeed.com and I truly appreciate you taking the time to read my posts and being apart of the Succeed Feed community. When you have to wait a year to sleep next to a tree, something is wrong.George Carlin, I dont have to tell you it goes without saying there are some things better left unsaid. Some people dream of things that never were and ask, Why not? Whether youre looking for inspirational or funny quotes by George Carlin or whether youre looking for his famous quotes politics and education, its all here. googletag.pubads().disableInitialLoad(); And fight songs. Its because volunteers work for no pay. Its only a piece of cloth. George Carlin, 75.The things that matter in this country have been reduced in choice, there are two political parties, there are a handful of insurance companies, there are six or seven information centers.. but if you want a bagel there are 23 flavors. We havent tried that for a while. Instead of warning pregnant women not to drink, I think female alcoholics ought to be told not to fuck. George Carlin, 52. It will be Nike sneakers and Smiley shirts. Maybe this time itll work. Religion has convinced people that there's an invisible man living in the sky. One good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends is that three out of four murders are committed by people who know the victim. Planet, species, race, nation, state, religion, party, union, club, association, neighborhood improvement committee; I have no interest in any of it. By and large, language is a tool for concealing the truth. "ObfuscatedMarketplaceId": "A1PQBFHBHS6YH1" throw new Error("could not load device-specific stylesheet : " + err.message); Most people work just hard enough not to get fired and get paid just enough not to quit. George Carlin, 21. _Q: [] The upper class: keeps all of the money, pays none of the taxes. "Application": "GoodreadsMonolith", The planet is fine. Or, at the very least, it will be slanted to suit them, and then rarely followed up. And the main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid." 2. Source; . Inspirational George Carlin Quotes 1. "Events.SushiEndpoint": "https://unagi.amazon.com/1/events/com.amazon.csm.csa.prod", return cookiePair[1]; 4. The planet is fine. Dont just teach your children to read Teach them to question everything that they read Teach them to question everything. George Carlin, 86. var cookies = document.cookie.split('; '); var gads = document.createElement("script"); Its interested in its own power. When fascism comes to America, it will not be in brown and black shirts. If you cant beat them, arrange to have them beaten. George Carlin, 47. " George Carlin 14. Carlin and his "Seven dirty words" comedy routine were central to the 1978 U.S. Supreme Court case F.C.C. To view the purposes they believe they have legitimate interest for, or to object to this data processing use the vendor list link below. "Laugh often, long and loud. [CDATA[ I have certain rules I live by. He loves you and he needs money. George Carlin. The challenge is to find it. 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When you're born in America, you get a front row seat. "Some people have no idea what they're doing, and a lot of them are really good at it." ~ (George Carlin). Tell people an invisible man in the sky created all things, they believe you. The owners of this country know the truth: Its called the American dream because you have to be asleep to believe it. George Carlin, 83.Theres a reason education sucks, and its the same reason it will never ever ever be fixed. Governments don't want a population capable of critical thinking, they want obedient workers, people just smart enough to run the machines and just dumb enough to passively accept their situation.You have no choice. url = "https://s.gr-assets.com/assets/mobile/phone_hd_images-2b89833762f600506d44865a33582d11.css"; George Carlin was an American stand-up comedian, actor, social critic and author. Tell people theres an invisible man in the sky who created the universe, and the vast majority will believe you. Its disgusting, man. They will only bring you down to their level and beat you with experience. George Carlin, I like it when a flower or a little tuft of grass grows through a crack in the concrete. Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups. [CDATA[ Use your fucking heads! Are these people kidding? If you vote and you elect dishonest, incompetent people into office who screw everything up, you are responsible for what they have done. (function () { They're imaginary. 3140. I think TV remotes should have a button that allows you to kill the person on the screen. George Carlin Government Quotes "Religion is like a pair of shoes..Find one that fits for you, but don't make me wear your shoes." George Carlin "Religion is just mind control. No money to be made off of the homeless. Famous quotes on life, death, politics and of course the American government. The people are fucked! George Carlin, 80. Political correctness is Americas newest form of intolerance, and it is especially pernicious because it comes disguised as tolerance. Dont sweat the petty things and dont pet the sweaty things. Right in the fucking head! "Boy everyone in this country is running around yammering about their fucking rights. They want obedient workers, people who are just smart enough to run the machines and do the paperwork. Life gets really simple once you cut out all the bull shit they teach you in school. George Carlin. The people are fucked." George Carlin tags: funny , humanity , humor 8709 likes Like "Government want to tell you things you can't say because they're against the law, or you can't say this because it's against a regulation, or here's something you can't say because its a.secret; "You can't tell him that because he's not cleared to know that." Government wants to control information and control . What exactly is viewer discretion? If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done? Tell them the paint is wet, and they have to touch it to be sure.George Carlin, Instead of warning pregnant women not to drink,I think female alcoholics ought to be told not to fuckGeorge Carlin, I tried to believe that there is a God, who created each of us in His own image and likeness, loves us very much, and keeps a close eye on things. Im not sure silencing people or forcing them to alter their speech is the best method for solving problems that go much deeper than speech. George Carlin, 62. My first rule: I don't believe anything the government tells me. You will do things in the name of a group that you would never do on your own. And far from staying to the safer path, he leapt time and again past the cliff of common wisdom, in the hopes of rattling us into questioning the way we live.
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